The Reaction from Abroad, Great Britain: The Second American Civil War
“YANKS NEED TRANQS”—Headline in The Daily Galaxy, a London Tabloid
As if further proof were needed
that the Dis-United States of America
is a failed experiment, the Yanks
have gone more bonkers than a cage
crammed with meth-crazed chimps.
Rather than continue to bicker
as they normally do in Congress,
the two sides have declared war.
The nub of the confrontation?
The maniacs of Guns for America—
proof that those with the impulse control
of small, sugar-maddened children
should not be allowed near weapons—
have declared the overthrow of
“The illegitimate government,
in the name of our holy democracy.”
Of course, the yabbos are oblivious
to the Newtonian Law that for every action
there is an opposite and equal reaction.
Hence Society for Progressive Change—
a hitherto laughable gun control group—
has been training the multitudes
that have volunteered to fight in its ranks,
“To keep our country from the clutches
of a gun-wild theocracy.”
Only in the States can one fight gun insanity
with more guns, in the country’s death rattle,
which we’ve predicted ever since their naive
Declaration of Independence, almost
three centuries ago to the day.